Once upon a time, I vowed not to lose myself becoming a wife and mother, when each of those moments came. Yet, it has become entirely too easy to neglect the deepest parts of myself for more pressing things on my list. I resent that I have let myself go in some respects. It is important to feed my soul. I think probably for everyone it's different... maybe reading scripture, a cup of coffee with a dear friend, a dig in the garden, a trip to the market, conversation with a friend, a good pedicure. For me, it's many of these things and more. I need to be inspired to be a better wife and mother. Sometimes I believe I can just press on, doing the things that have to be done without doing those things I enjoy and that infuse me with life and energy and joy. And I neglect my time in the Word, and I pay for it. Lord, give me a fresh desire for Your Word in my life.
Some of the songs by East Mountain South have been a rain to my soul with their depth and soul. Thank you Kat and Peter for writing your hearts. Though at times dark, my melancholy self is refreshed and pointed again to the Savior.
Ryan made me a little garden this spring (along with Evan's sandbox). I have several things planted and that is a joy to me. I hope something will grow and bear "fruit". Growth has always been a mystery to me. We plant, we water, we weed.... yet God causes the growth. It's a daily reminder to me of God's sovereignty. I understand more each day why my grandmother always enjoyed having something growing. I now have a big sand box next to Evan's for me to dig in, cultivate, and enjoy. Thank you, baby!
If anyone reads this, I hope you are encouraged to look to Christ for your hope, find your roots, seek encouragement for the deepest part of yourself, and know that you are not alone. We journey together, friends. And I love you.
2 comments:
Thanks so much, Dara. I've been neglecting my own time in the Word and have this week been reminded of the necessity of it to my being the wife and mom God desires me to be. And yay for your garden - you'll have to post pics of any and all new growth! :)
Yes, we're going to leave this one out since it's so special. Plus it's a great daily reminder of God's precious gift!
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